The terms delayed gratification, self-control, and self-regulation are frequently applied inconsistently and interchangeably. Delay gratification is defined as the ability to postpone an inclination for an immediate reward in exchange for a more favorable reward at a later moment. According to studies, highly successful people have the ability to resist gratification. It’s all about self-control and discipline when it comes to delayed pleasure. It entails avoiding the immediate gratification of a smaller reward in exchange for a larger benefit later. Self-control and discipline, not unexpectedly, play a key role in academic and life success.
Unfortunately, delaying gratification is becoming more difficult than ever before in today’s fast-paced, technologically savvy world. On the plus side, both instructors and parents may actively teach youngsters this crucial trait.
Why is Delayed Gratification Important for Children
It’s obvious that the ability to delay gratification is connected to the ability to exercise self-control. We frequently think of delayed gratification as “work now, play later” as adults. Get a difficult work completed now so you can watch your favourite sitcom on Netflix or nap later. Another example of delayed gratification is putting off eating cake or pizza now in exchange for weight loss and/or better health later.
How strong is your muscle of “delayed gratification”? Do you recall how often you used that skill as a kid or a teenager? Delaying gratification is a talent that can be improved with practice, just like intellectual skills.
Delayed gratification has been found to help people achieve their goals. It also appears to be linked to happiness and long-term life success, as evidenced by Mischel’s marshmallow test follow-up.
For children, delayed gratification is vital because it sets a lifelong precedent. Children who never delay gratification will struggle to resist temptation and achieve their goals as adults. Meanwhile, individuals who learn this difficult talent now will grow up to be successful, achieve their goals, and have better health and happiness.
How to Infuse Delayed Gratification at Home or in the Classroom
We know that delayed gratification is important—and that it can be taught—but how can we cultivate it in our classrooms or at home? Try out a few of these activities with the kids you look after.
Play “STOP and GO” Games
Although impulse control isn’t typically thought of as entertaining, you may help children practise using a number of fun “stop and go” games. Follow the Leader, Simon Says, Red Light-Green Light, and Freeze Dance are a few examples (e.g., dance until the music stops, then freeze).
Children will control their immediate, knee-jerk reactions, follow directions, take turns, and/or wait patiently in these activities.
CREATE TRUST
One of the reasons why delayed gratification is so difficult is that there is rarely any surety of a future reward. As a result, it’s crucial to provide a stable environment in which self-control is valued. If you promise your children that if they wait patiently for an hour, they will be able to watch TV, make sure you keep your word. It’s also vital to keep your word if you promise your pupils five minutes of chat time at the conclusion of class if they work quietly until then.
One of the reasons why delayed gratification is so difficult is that there is rarely any surety of a future reward. As a result, it’s crucial to provide a stable environment in which self-control is valued. If you promise your children that if they wait patiently for an hour, they will be able to watch TV, make sure you keep your word. It’s also vital to keep your word if you promise your pupils five minutes of chat time at the conclusion of class if they work quietly until then.
MODEL SELF-RESPECT
Because children imitate what they see, it’s critical to model the self-control you want your children to exhibit. Talk to your kids about things like saving money and waiting patiently, for example.
If stuck in traffic, say something like, “Traffic is moving really slow and we have been waiting for so long. I just need to be patient, and we’ll get home eventually.”
As a teacher, you can tell your students, “I wanted to buy a new pair of shoes this weekend, but I didn’t really need them, so I decided not to. I’m saving money to buy ___________,” or, “I want to eat this candy now, but I’ll wait until after lunch.”
SET ACHIEVABLE
Another reason it’s difficult to delay gratification and achieve goals is that they’re often times unrealistic. It’s difficult to find the self-discipline to continue with a goal that seems unreachable and avoid other, more immediate pleasures when it appears impossible.
Teach kids how to develop realistic goals that they can reach. Other options include making a practical plan to attain goals, posting visual reminders of goals, dividing big goals into smaller steps, and posting visual reminders of goals.
Finally, applaud yourself for reaching your objectives! Children will be motivated to defer gratification and achieve greater goals in the future as a result of their sense of accomplishment and pride.
Mark Off Days on a Calendar
Marking off days on a calendar is a simple way to teach delayed gratification. Is there anything that your students or children are looking forward to? Mark the date of the event on a calendar and cross off the days as they pass.
This practice teaches youngsters that anticipation can be enjoyable, and it serves as a visual reminder that the reward they’ve been anticipating will finally arrive.
FIND CREATIVE DISTRACTIONS
Walter Mischel discovered that the youngsters who were most adept in waiting for the second marshmallow found pleasant, creative distractions during his marshmallow test research.
This isn’t the same as saying, “Here, hold my phone!” to divert a child’s attention away from a tantrum. Mischel is referring to children learning how to refocus their minds and reject temptation on their own.
Counting backwards, reading a book, colouring, exercising or moving, listening to music, and diverting their concentration to something else are all good distraction tactics to educate youngsters. When youngsters feel frustrated or impatient, calming tactics can help.
